Treatment for Premature Ejaculation

Remember, when most of us think about the word “sex” we think about penetration and intercourse. Sometimes the stress of trying to “last longer” causes a man to feel inadequate, selfish and guilty. This will only make the situation worse.

Intercourse is usually an enjoyable part of lovemaking and it is understandable why a couple might want it to last longer. However, it is important for them to explore other options for sexual stimulation. There are many ways for a couple to enjoy physical contact. Some options are: oral sex, using fingers or sex toys to stimulate a partner or oneself, mutual masturbation, watching or reading erotic materials together, talking “dirty” … the list is endless.

Having said that, a man may want to deal with what he considers premature ejaculation by learning to control and predict his ejaculations. Here are some ways to do this:

  • Stop-Start Method - This is the most commonly “prescribed” method of learning to control ejaculation. It can be done during intercourse with a partner, oral sex, or while masturbating alone or with the help of a partner. The man should bring himself (or his partner should help him) almost to the point of ejaculation, but then stop for about 30 seconds. He should take a breath or withdraw and then start again. This pattern is repeated until he wants to let the ejaculation happen. If a man practices this often, especially by masturbating, he should be able to learn to delay ejaculation.

  • The “Squeeze” Method - This is much the same as the Stop-Start Method except that when the man is almost at the point of ejaculation, either he or his partner gently squeezes the end of the penis (where the glans meets the shaft) for several seconds. There should be no more movement for about 30 seconds and then continue, repeating until he wants ejaculation to happen.

  • Control the PC muscles - Many women know about Kegel exercises to control the PC muscles – the muscles used to start and stop urinating. Men have these muscles, as well. When a man ejaculates, these muscles need to be relaxed. By strengthening and learning to control the PC muscles, a man can have more control over his ejaculation. To strengthen these muscles, he should squeeze them as if he’s trying to stop himself from peeing. Hold the muscles tight for a few seconds. Relax. Repeat. (Do not do this until the point of exhaustion or it becomes painful.) After practicing awhile, a few times a day, the muscles will become stronger.

  • Change sex positions - It is often more difficult for a man to control his ejaculations when he is on top of his partner (missionary position). Try new positions (spooning, woman on top) to slow things down and help prolong intercourse. Allowing the woman to control the speed can also help the man resist the hard and quick motions that encourage ejaculation.

  • Couple Communication - If a man is feeling stressed, shy or tense about premature ejaculation, he is more likely to have problems. By talking with his partner, he can feel more confident about dealing with the situation. Men often find that they have fewer concerns with premature ejaculation when they feel comfortable in their relationship and the situation is familiar.

  • Numbing creams - Mandelay (gel) and Stud 100 (spray) are some examples. The active ingredient, benzocaine, numbs the genital area and helps slow the onset of ejaculation. However, because it is a numbing agent, many men find it also reduces the sensitivity and pleasure of intercourse.

  • Condoms - Using thicker or even normal condoms can effectively reduce some of the sensations associated with intercourse and thus delay ejaculation.

  • Counseling - When dealing with persistent psychologically related premature ejaculation, psychotherapy or related treatment is sometimes helpful. Counseling can be individual or couple based.

  • Drugs - In some cases doctors prescribe antidepressants such as Prozac, Paxil or Zoloft to treat premature ejaculation.

(Sources: MedlinePlus, Canadian Men's Clinic)